Recently, I put my status on facebook this way:
You don’t know them. LOL.
Those whom I know, just met a couple of times and good enough to know him/her. Enough said. They might not know your name though. Haha!
A friend would know you on the surface. There would be some boundaries between you. You choose carefully the things you would want to say. You wouldn’t really know their background and all, but at least you’ll know their name and vice versa. You don’t really mind spending time with them, although you might choose to do something else which is more important. :p
Good friends would be those whom you would prefer spending your time with. Would try their best to tell you if you are doing something wrong in a very subtle manner, or the most appropriate manner. They would know you well enough about your interests and all. They would also know your likes and dislikes, and would respect you for that. They’ll usually be concerned about your feelings, and try their best to make you happy.
Would be the ones whom you spend a lot of time with. Would know you better than most people. they would try their best to be there for you if you need them. You wouldn’t mind asking them for help if you have a problem, and they wouldn’t mind helping you out. You don’t really mind spending money on them, and wouldn’t ask anything from you in return of their favour. Would notice if there’s something wrong with you even before you tell them. They would be offended if people talk bad about you, and will try their best to defend you, even if you are not there. They’ll try their best to cheer you up when you are down, and celebrate with you whenever you achieve something. Hey would never hurt you intentionally (well they shouldn’t! :p). Technically, they are almost like your best friend.
They know you, inside out. They are almost like your twin. I’ve been thinking about it for quite a while now… can or should a person have more than one best friend? Because the term ‘best’ itself should imply one and only, greatest, most valuable (?) thing, or in this case friend that one could ever have. But I still remember a quote that I mentioned sometime last year:
“You would be considered very lucky if you can find 5 best friends in your life”
So I did some research on the net. And urban dictionary’s top 3 definitions of best friends that I attracted me most are:
1. Best Friends are very special people in your life. They are the first people you think about when you make plans. They are the first people you go to when you need someone to talk to. You will phone them up just to talk about nothing, or the most important things in your life. When you’re sad they will try their hardest to cheer you up. They give the best hugs in the world! They are the shoulder to cry on, because you know that they truly care about you. In most cases they would take a bullet for you, coz it would be too painful to watch you get hurt.
2 Girl best friends: They do all the girly things together, no one says anything.
2 Boy best friends: They do all the boy stuff together, no one says anything.
1 Boy + 1 Girl best friends: They do boy and girl stuff, People says lots of stuff
2. Many people, not all, go through different best friends throughout life. However, usually a person only has one real, true best friend in all that time. A best friend is not only someone you have a good time with; it is also someone you believe you can trust your life with. A best friend is the first person you call when the most amazing things happen in your life, and when the most horrific incidents happen. A best friend is the person you will always remember no matter what comes about. Some people lose the only true best friend they will ever have, and even when they get new “best friend”, that old, real best friend is always on their mind. A best friend is almost like real family, a best friend gives the opinion you usually care most about. A best friend is the one who tells you the things you absolutely need to hear regardless of whether you want to hear it or not. A best friend is the person you usually can be around always and never get sick of. A best friend is someone you don’t envy, and is the person you are grateful to have as a friend. A best friend is the one who will forgive you always, even when you’ve screwed up so bad. And a best friend is the one who even though you may have drifted apart from, when the time comes for them to hug you or congratulate you on an accomplishment or to console you on a loss, they are the number one person you want to see, always because they are the person you’ve confided the most in and they are the person who knows you the best… even when you both have changed.
Your real, true best friend is your comfort zone.
3. A person(s) that you can trust and are very close with. A person who you know very well, and not just them but their family as well, most likely someone you grew up with. People you care about regardless of what stupid shit they do. People that are honest and TRUE. People you are so close with you have “inside” secrets with or code words. People that you can just look at a certain way and they KNOW EXACTLY what you are talking about
When you can sit and laugh at memories from the past for HOURS.
So what can we conclude here? I would say that there’s no rule whatsoever saying that you can only have 1 best friend. By collecting bits and pieces from the definitions above, I would say that a best friend:
- Knows you very well
- Is a person where you can tell everything that’s bugging you
- Will try their best to be there for you
- Always in your head when you have some good/bad experience
- Will know the right thing to say to you even when they don’t agree with you
- The person that you won’t really mind spending a lot of time with
- Appreciates you
- Will have the shoulder to cry on
- Finishes all your food without even asking (beware! Some friends would actually do this to you and that’s just plain rude!)
- Will know the good and the bad stuff that you do and adapt to it.
I wouldn’t say that these criteria are to be followed strictly. The truth is, I wrote it down because I feel like I have a lot of friends, and each of them acts differently, thus I decided to try and decipher what kind of friend are they. Another reason is that, lately, a lot of things happened around me, and I am really touched when a few friends noticed that I have not been happy like the usual me. I also felt a lot of love around. I felt them some of them genuinely care about how I feel, and voluntarily asked me if I need any advices or not. They keep on saying “you know you can talk to me right?”. My heart just melted and I am very grateful to God that I met these people.
About the ranking and all, it doesn’t really make a difference to the basic principles of human relations. The bottom line is, just respect other people. Appreciate them. It doesn’t really matter if they are your good friend or just friend; just treat them how you want to be treated. Some people are just ignorant, they consider themselves as your friend, but will say a lot of bad stuff about you. To me, true friends wouldn’t do that. I would still say hi to those who hurt me. But I keep my distance. And I stick to those who appreciate me. And I appreciate them back. And these ranking of friends I put earlier, is really not permanent. There’s a very fine line between each level that I can’t really put in words. I tried my best, really. Feel free to drop any comments or correct me if I’m wrong.
So after all that has been said, which group do you belong to? :p